


Some Secret Place To Cry

by Pink_and_Velvet



Category: Top Gun (1986)
Genre: Crying, Developing Relationship, Emotions, Fluff, M/M, Phone Calls, long distance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 13:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19746274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pink_and_Velvet/pseuds/Pink_and_Velvet
Summary: Nothing terrified Maverick into silence more than Iceman being on the other side of the world, alone and afraid.





	Some Secret Place To Cry

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from Berlin’s “Take My Breath Away” for obvious reasons ;)

“Maverick?”

Nine months had passed. 276 days to be precise. 276 days since the final encounter with Kazansky. 276 days since he abandoned his Wingman. They had spoken, kept in touch, somewhat. He hadn’t the faintest clue where the Iceman was, where he and Slider were, but he tried. Iceman had also tried, which surprised him most of all. A postcard here, a phone call there. Whatever it was, Maverick embraced it. Embraced Iceman.

It was coming up on 4am. Maverick couldn’t sleep. He had been tossing and turning, clothes slick with sweat as the Miramar heat robbed him of another night.

He clung to the phone and stifled a yawn.

“…Mav?” His green eyes widened. What was that tone?

The rich, silken voice was barely audible. It was a whisper, seemingly forced. As though he hadn’t wanted to make the call at all. The tones weren’t cold, strained but they were anything but cold. The silence lay thick as Maverick let it linger.

“Mav, just _talk_ to me- are you even there?” Maverick frowned, let his head tip back to collide with the wall.

Where was he? Maverick wasn’t sure himself. He’d act as though he hadn’t been wasting his nights savouring the memories of Iceman. All of Iceman. The way his pen always flowed through his deft fingers, how each strand of golden hair had its primed and perfected place. How his perfect cupid’s bow lips would invite his own to part, invite his own closer. The distinct sheen of sweat that somehow always seemed to coat his beautifully tanned skin…

Iceman the night on the carrier. The victory. _Their_ victory.

“I, I miss you Mav.” Maverick’s grip on the phone tightened.

He took a steadying breath, submerging himself in the whispered words of Iceman.

“It’s driving me- it’s driving me crazy.” 

Maverick’s pulse sped up, his breathing became ragged. Nothing concerned him more than when Iceman couldn’t cope, when Iceman couldn’t see things through.

“I can’t do this anymore.” The icy edges were frayed, his voice sounded rough.

Maverick thought nothing could frighten him more than the notion of abandoning Iceman with six MiG’s on his tail, yelling at him over the comms to help him. To save him. Anything Iceman could do to shield his fear. Now, Maverick knew, that nothing could terrify him more than this Iceman. Iceman being afraid, so unsure of himself. The war he was fighting, alone. Alone and where? He couldn’t ask and he knew, Iceman couldn’t tell him.

Nothing destroyed Maverick more than when Iceman couldn’t save himself.

“Maverick… I, I need-“

Why he couldn’t bring himself to speak, Maverick wasn’t sure. What he was sure of though, was the tears pricking at his eyes, threatening to burn in hot streaks down his cheeks knowing that the same threat had taken over Iceman. To listen to Iceman stutter and try to pace himself. To listen to Iceman choke off his own sobs.

“Ice… I.”

Maverick let his tears fall. He cursed himself as he let out a sob, knowing Iceman had heard it. He didn’t want to worry him anymore than Maverick was sure he already was.

_I can’t save you this time, Ice._

“-I need you, Mav. I can’t, I won’t be able too… _do_ this... without you.”

What was he doing? How could Maverick ever know. The phone collided with the floor, his hands were shaking so much that clutching to it, to Iceman, was too much.

He lay there in complete silence, savoured by the faint ‘Mav’ forcing its way through the phone. Forcing its way into Maverick’s soul. He did cry then, tears synching to the dull sound of Iceman’s all those hundreds of miles away.

Nothing destroyed Maverick more than knowing, he couldn’t save Iceman.


End file.
